


where are you? what happened? (i want what we had)

by nonafng



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Insecure Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Jealous Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Like lots of it, M/M, Mentioned Alexis | Quackity, Mentioned Darryl Noveschosch, Pining, Seemingly unrequited love, Unrequited Love, also, dream is insecure, literally just Dream being painfully in love for 2k words, only a little bit though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-18
Updated: 2021-02-18
Packaged: 2021-03-13 21:27:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29532681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nonafng/pseuds/nonafng
Summary: He’s missed George so much, he misses him now, even though he’s right here, in call with him. He doesn’t think he’ll ever stop missing George, it’s a permanent aspect of his life now, has been for the past five years. The seal on his chest breaks and he overflows with it.“I miss you.”Shit.George is silent for a suspiciously long time in which Dream goes through the five stages of grief, but before he spirals too far George breaks the silence and brings him back.“I miss you too.”(Or, Dream thinks too much.)
Relationships: Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 61





	where are you? what happened? (i want what we had)

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry that I make Dream sad all the time /: it’s called projecting!
> 
> (Originally posted under anon.)

_George_  
_Team Speak?_

He waits for the little ‘delivered’ icon to pop up next to his message, once it does he sits back in his chair, places his hands in the pockets of his hoodie and closes his eyes. A shaky sigh leaves his mouth. 

Things between him and George have been... not great. There’s a weird feeling in the air whenever they talk to each other. His rationality says it’s not unbearable but the rest of him says otherwise. 

The thing is, Dream knows it’s most likely his own fault, he’s not dumb. He knows that he’s been clinging to George more than usual. That, mixed with the fact that he’s been fixating on other things for a while now does not help the space he feels expanding between them.

He cracks an eye open to peak at his and George’s chat, only to close it again when he finds that his messages are still unread. He shuts his eyes tighter and tries not to overthink (which is easier said than done when he’s alone with no one but himself). 

George was streaming, he knows this because he had seen the notification for the stream pop up on his phone a few hours prior. He also knows however (because of Twitter) that an hour or so in, George stopped streaming and instead stayed online to mess around with the others on the server. 

He frowns, decides to grab his phone off of his desk and collapses back into his seat again. He knows he’ll most likely regret doing what he’s about to do and end up in an even more sour mood, but he still opens Twitter and scrolls through the timeline against his better judgement. 

He clicks on the first clip he sees, it’s of George’s stream before he ended it. It’s honestly not even a monumental clip, it’s just George and his friends messing around on the server, everyone is talking over each other so much that he can barely decipher any words. 

But seeing George always irrationally makes Dream feel calmer and George’s blinding smile in the corner of the clip does nothing to change that fact.

At one point the words _Quackity fell from a high place_ appears in chat which causes everyone in the call to break out into even more chaos. 

It’s a mess of voice effects and cackling from everyone in the call and George is laughing so hard that he’s silent except for a few tiny squeaks, his head is thrown back and he’s covering most of his face with his hands and Dream _aches._

He locks his phone, tosses it probably a little too hard on his desk and runs his hand through his hair, pulling slightly at the ends, repeat. George probably isn’t going to reply, he’s busy, which okay, Dream knew that. 

But it’s been a few hours since he decided to stream and he thought maybe.. he doesn’t know what he thought. That maybe George would prioritise Dream over everyone else? Just for tonight. 

It’s a selfish thought and he knows that, he knows how god damn selfish he is when it comes to George. It’s a fact, one of many that relate to him and his best friend. He also knows he’s been distant and snappy and a borderline asshole but _god,_ he just wanted things to feel normal for _one night._

It’s not George’s fault either, it’s another one of those facts he knows. But the irrational part of his brain is telling him _hey, George is purposely ignoring your messages_ and that just.. hurts. It’s pathetic really, here he is, alone in his room, on his way to a breakdown all because George won’t acknowledge him. 

Dream didn’t even realise his right leg had been bouncing the whole time, he doesn’t try to stop it. 

That moment of George laughing and smiling is on loop in his brain, it’s almost torture. Dream can’t remember the last time George laughed like that with him, it was probably a while ago, before everything between them got so weird. _Why did I let it get this weird?_

Sitting up straight, he pulls himself closer to his desk and locates Quackity’s stream. 

Dream’s actually kind of surprised when he doesn’t hear an onslaught of auto-tune and yelling as soon as the video begins. The only sound that can be heard is a soft humming (of the Badboyhalo variety) and Quackity’s dono sound. 

There’s no sounds from anyone else on the server including Quackity and notably, George. 

For a second Dream thinks that George left the server and in turn, Quackity’s stream a while ago, and almost starts panicking at the thought that George genuinely is ignoring his messages, _Oh god._ But then Quackity tabs for a second to sees who’s on the server and Dream is able to spot George’s name immediately. 

He lets out a sigh he didn’t realise he was holding in but instantly feels shame overcome him when he realises how insecure he’s being. He ducks his head for a moment and wishes he could magically expel all the negative thoughts racing around in his brain right now. _George isn’t ignoring you, he’s busy, stop being an idiot._

With a little more determination now, Dream makes a last ditch effort to gain George’s attention, he clicks over to their messages and types,

_Can I talk to you?_

He cringes for a moment after hitting send but immediately gains composure. The message sounds a little dire and honestly at this point? Yeah, to dream it does feel dire, he’s a little desperate but he’s hopeful George will see his message this time around. 

He settles back into his chair and resumes the position he was in before, hands in his hoodie pockets, back all the way against his chair, eyes shut tightly. 

“Guys, I think I’m gonna head off.” 

Dream’s quick to open his eyes and bring his focus back to the computer screen. His heart does something stupid at the soft sound of George’s voice. He quickly (read:eagerly) scans his messages to George, his pulse spikes when he sees that George has _finally_ read them. 

He tabs over to Quackity’s stream as a bunch of _awww_ ’s ring out and everyone protests George’s departure. George sounds tired but genuine enough when he says that he had enjoyed the stream and was glad that he stayed for a while. 

Goodbye’s are said and just like that, George has left the server and the group call as well. 

Dream is quick to exit the stream and full screen his and George’s chat. Just as he clicks on the maximise tab he sees George’s typing bubble appear, his heart is in his throat. There’s a little _ding._

_Of course_  
_I’m calling now._

Dream can’t explain the mix of emotions his body goes through at that moment. He thinks he can pinpoint relief and then affection and then dread but it’s confusing and he doesn’t have enough time to analyse them all before the Team Speak Dial tone can be heard through his speakers. It doesn’t even ring once before Dream answers the call. 

For a moment there’s complete silence. And then,

“Dream?”

It’s so soft and so _George,_ his heart hurts so much. 

“Hey.” Dream’s voice is barely above a whisper and it cracks which would almost be embarrassing if he wasn’t so preoccupied with George and listening for when he speaks next. 

“What did you you want to talk to me about?” 

George’s question comes out sleep laden and a little quiet because the older is clearly tired, but his voice has that soothing soft quality to it right now that Dream finds comforting so it’s hard to feel too guilty about keeping him up for longer. 

“I just wanted to talk to you.” 

His voice betrays him like it so often does. The statement comes out too sweet, too genuine and he can feel his cheeks burn. There’s a fuzzy pull of recognition at the back of his skull, déjà vu, like they’ve both been here in this exact moment before. Dream doesn’t even want to try and dispute that thought because they probably _have_ been here before, Dream never could control himself when it came to George, not really.

He belatedly thinks that he only exists to do one thing, _pine after George and his company._ Again he thinks, _I’m so pathetic._

There’s a soft hum resounding throughout Dreams speakers. Dream has a fleeting thought that he wishes he was on call with George in the warmth of his bed rather than at his desk on the computer so he could be a little delusional in the comfort of his blankets. 

“How was editing today?” 

Conversation flows a little easier after that, George always did know how to resolve tension in call. Dream swears it’s his special ability or something, he admires him for that. He admires him for a lot of reasons. 

Even though they talk about nothing of any import, Dream still finds himself extremely engaged. It’s most likely just because he’s _finally_ speaking to George after a few days of not being able to directly hear his voice, it’s definitely because of George. 

He easily convinces George to end call and give him a second so he’s able to move to his bed and call back on his phone. Things get quieter after that, not a bad quiet but a comfortable sort of stillness resounds in the air that Dream finds relieving. 

He’s happy they can still be like this, even with everything going on. Even with all the weird tension and Dreams preoccupation and George’s new friends. They’re still _George and Dream._

At one point George giggles because of some dumb joke Dream’s said and his chest fills with so much affection he thinks he’s going to overflow with it. 

He’s missed George so much, he misses him now, even though he’s right here, in call with him. He doesn’t think he’ll ever stop missing George, it’s a permanent aspect of his life now, has been for the past five years. The seal on his chest breaks and he overflows with it. 

“I miss you.” _Shit._

George is silent for a suspiciously long time in which Dream goes through the five stages of grief, but before he spirals too far George breaks the silence and brings him back.

“I miss you too.” 

Dream closes his eyes and lets himself fall. His bed is warm and George is so sweet. It’s late for him, early in the morning and everything feels like it’s not real but he knows it is. George misses him, _misses!_ As in _actively_ missing him currently, right now. He misses him right now as well. 

It hurts somewhere deep in his chest, a different hurt than the aches he’s been getting all night. It fills him with hope and he doesn’t have the energy to dread if it’s false or not. 

There’s no room for teasing, Dream doesn’t think he has the heart to make light of the moment, he wants to remember this conversation how it really was, genuine and sweet and _exactly_ what Dream needed to pull him out of his negative thoughts. If either of them decided to make a joke out of this it would probably be the final nail in Dream’s figurative coffin. 

Because Dream really has missed George, he’s been sick with longing, so sick. And George misses him too and if that isn’t the best confirmation Dream could have gotten that George wasn’t ignoring him on purpose and that _Yes! You idiot of course he still cares about you!_ Then Dream doesn’t know what would have sufficed better. 

They don’t really acknowledge the confessions that they both so easily gave up but conversation continues to be just as soft and soothing for the rest of the time that George is awake. Dream doesn’t know how long exactly it takes for George to fall asleep but if he stayed on call for a few extra minutes to hear George’s soft breathes on the other end of the call, no one needs to know. 

They’ll be okay though.

**Author's Note:**

> Title from ‘Tangerine’ by Glass Animals.
> 
> Twt: nonafng


End file.
